Who Sucks and Who Doesn’t Suck - End of Season Grades | FinHeaven - Miami Dolphins Forums

Who Sucks and Who Doesn’t Suck - End of Season Grades

royalshank

royalshank

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Well, w a dismal showing in the 3rd quarter (again), got nothing better to do than reflect on a year of suckery. Since we sucked this season, it’s fitting that key players be graded on a scale of “suckiness” from “Totally Sucks” to “Doesn’t Suck at All”. Think of it like Totally Sucks is an “F” and Doesn’t Suck at All is an “A”. Here goes:

QB
1. Tua - Totally Sucks; moving on.
2. Quinn Ewers - Does Not Suck. Processes the field fast and has some moxie. Will be in the QB1 conversation next year.
3. Zach Wilson - Kinda Sucks. Didn’t play this year but we know.

RB
1. Achane - Doesn’t Suck at All. Great player and MVP.
2. Jaylen Wright - Kinda Sucks. Vision ain’t great nor is ball security. Fine backup player.
3. Ollie Gordon - Kinda Sucks. Overhyped player who gets dropped on short yardage for losses more than he makes it.

OL
1. Patrick Paul - Doesn’t Suck. Building block.
2. Johnah Savienaauan - Totally Sucks. Horrible rookie year and does not deserve to be playing. However, needs the reps because we traded up for this guy / can develop into Not Sucking.
3. A’Aron Brewer - Does Not Suck. Most athletic C we’ve had since Dwight Stephenson.
4. Daniel Brunskill - Does Not Suck. Made the season interesting for us.
5. Everyone else - Sucks.

WR
1. Waddle - Doesn’t Suck. Good player.
2. ???

TE
1. Greg Dulcich - Doesn’t Suck. Good find. Physical player who can catch and get up field.

DL
1. Zach Sieler - Does Not Suck. Came on strong 2nd half of the year. Nice FG block today.
2. Kenneth Grant, Jordan Phillips, Zeke Biggers - Kinda Suck. All of them. Fat ****s who can’t get to the QB. Would be ok if they made up for it in the run game. Just not good enough but can develop - and lose some weight, boys.

Edge
1. Bradley Chubb - Does Not Suck. Might not be the smartest player on the team but high effort and makes plays here and there.
2. Chop Robinson - Kinda Sucked this year.

LB
1. Jordan Brooks - Doesn’t Not Suck at All. MVP of the defense. Plays hurt. Racks up tackles and big stops. Throwback football player. Need more tough guys like him.

DB
1. Minkah - Doesn’t Suck at All! MVP of the secondary this year.
2. R Douglass - Doesn’t Suck at All. Terrific year for him - bring him back for ‘26.

ST
1. Riley Patterson - Doesn’t Suck. Hit almost everything this season. Way to make the most of your shot.
2. Jake Bailey - Doesn’t Suck.

This season sucked from week 1 thanks to a horribly mismanaged roster with guys being signed at the end of the summer, out of retirement, contract extensions that made no sense etc. Good riddance to the 2025 campaign. And good riddance to Chris Grier - who absolutely, positively SUCKED at his job and has set the franchise up to Suck for quite some time.

See you all for another offseason.
 
ThePeopleShow13 said:
I mostly agree. I do think that Ollie can be a good back up. The main issue is that we bring him in for short yardage runs so teams know to stack the box. I’m not sure I’ve seen him make it to the LoS without getting hit by a defender very often this year.
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I mentioned this the other day too. He’s got to get some plays that aren’t 3rd or 4th and 1 to keep the D guessing. Otherwise just put the ball in Achane’s hands on those downs.
 
royalshank said:
Well, w a dismal showing in the 3rd quarter (again), got nothing better to do than reflect on a year of suckery. Since we sucked this season, it’s fitting that key players be graded on a scale of “suckiness” from “Totally Sucks” to “Doesn’t Suck at All”. Think of it like Totally Sucks is an “F” and Doesn’t Suck at All is an “A”. Here goes:

QB
1. Tua - Totally Sucks; moving on.
2. Quinn Ewers - Does Not Suck. Processes the field fast and has some moxie. Will be in the QB1 conversation next year.
3. Zach Wilson - Kinda Sucks. Didn’t play this year but we know.

RB
1. Achane - Doesn’t Suck at All. Great player and MVP.
2. Jaylen Wright - Kinda Sucks. Vision ain’t great nor is ball security. Fine backup player.
3. Ollie Gordon - Kinda Sucks. Overhyped player who gets dropped on short yardage for losses more than he makes it.

OL
1. Patrick Paul - Doesn’t Suck. Building block.
2. Johnah Savienaauan - Totally Sucks. Horrible rookie year and does not deserve to be playing. However, needs the reps because we traded up for this guy / can develop into Not Sucking.
3. A’Aron Brewer - Does Not Suck. Most athletic C we’ve had since Dwight Stephenson.
4. Daniel Brunskill - Does Not Suck. Made the season interesting for us.
5. Everyone else - Sucks.

WR
1. Waddle - Doesn’t Suck. Good player.
2. ???

TE
1. Greg Dulcich - Doesn’t Suck. Good find. Physical player who can catch and get up field.

DL
1. Zach Sieler - Does Not Suck. Came on strong 2nd half of the year. Nice FG block today.
2. Kenneth Grant, Jordan Phillips, Zeke Biggers - Kinda Suck. All of them. Fat ****s who can’t get to the QB. Would be ok if they made up for it in the run game. Just not good enough but can develop - and lose some weight, boys.

Edge
1. Bradley Chubb - Does Not Suck. Might not be the smartest player on the team but high effort and makes plays here and there.
2. Chop Robinson - Kinda Sucked this year.

LB
1. Jordan Brooks - Doesn’t Not Suck at All. MVP of the defense. Plays hurt. Racks up tackles and big stops. Throwback football player. Need more tough guys like him.

DB
1. Minkah - Doesn’t Suck at All! MVP of the secondary this year.
2. R Douglass - Doesn’t Suck at All. Terrific year for him - bring him back for ‘26.

ST
1. Riley Patterson - Doesn’t Suck. Hit almost everything this season. Way to make the most of your shot.
2. Jake Bailey - Doesn’t Suck.

This season sucked from week 1 thanks to a horribly mismanaged roster with guys being signed at the end of the summer, out of retirement, contract extensions that made no sense etc. Good riddance to the 2025 campaign. And good riddance to Chris Grier - who absolutely, positively SUCKED at his job and has set the franchise up to Suck for quite some time.

See you all for another offseason.
Click to expand...
All I know is that this season was one giant SUCKFEST!
 
flynryan15 said:
Waddle sucks he is soft! Always limping or playing hurt. Should have dumped him on the Bills for a 1st rounder and hit him hard once each game we played him and watch him disappear
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I’m afraid I’ll have to agree. Well some what. waddle doesn’t suck but he’s closer to scrub than elite
 
Thankfully, the suckery is over for this season. This is nearly a total rebuild.

Ewers played pretty well in his three game trial. Miami won't be in position to draft Mendoza, but should bring in competition.

The defense is terrible, outside of a few players. It's a young unit so hopefully some players will develop. Miami badly needs pass rushers.

Hopefully, the Dolphins get the right GM. I think that's the key, along with maybe rebuilding the scouting department.
 
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