Dolphin Joke

[DphinBillkiller]

A Patriot fan, a Jet fan and a Dolphin fan were all in
Saudi Arabia , sharing a smuggled crate of booze. All of a
sudden the Saudi police rushed in and arrested them. The
mere possession of alcohol is a severe offense in Saudi
Arabia, so for the terrible crime of actually being caught
consuming the booze, they were sentenced to death! However,
with the help of very good lawyers, they were able to
successfully appeal their sentence down to life
imprisonment.

By a stroke of luck, it was a Saudi National holiday the
day their trial finished,and the extremely benevolent Sheik
decided they could be released after receiving just 20
lashes each of the whip. As they were preparing for their
punishment, the Sheik suddenly said, "It's my first wife's
birthday today, and she has asked me to allow each of you
one wish before your whipping."

The Patriot fan was first in line (he had drunk the
least), so he thought about this for a while and then said,
"Please tie a pillow to my back." This was done, but the
pillow only lasted 10
lashes before the whip went through. The Patriot fan had
to be carried away bleeding and crying with pain when the
punishment was done.

The Jet fan was next up (he almost finished an entire
fifth by himself), and after watching the scene, said "All
Right! Please fix two pillows on my back." But even two
pillows could only take 15 lashes before the whip went
through again, sending the Jet fan out crying like a little
girl.

The Dolphin fan was the last one up (he had finished off
the crate), but before he could say anything, the Sheik
turned to him and said, "You support the greatest team in
the world, your team has some of the best and most loyal
football fans in the world. For this, you may have two
wishes!"

"Thanks, your most Royal highness," the Dolphin fan
replies.

"In recognition of your kindness, my first wish is that you
give me not 20, but 100 lashes."

"Not only are you an honorable, handsome and powerful man,
you are also very brave," the Sheik says with an admiring
look on his face. "If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so
be it. And your second wish? What is it to be?" the Sheik
asks.

"Tie the Jet fan to my back." :D


:rimshot:​

 

[armysoldier1385]

Chad Henne, Mark Sanchez, and Big Ben Roethlisberger are all in a car. They get pulled over and the cop says I wont arrest you if your dicks add up to 21 inches. So Henne whips it out and its 9 inches. Big Ben whips it out and its 9 inches. Sanchez whips it out and its 3 inches. The cop looks at em and says well its 21 inches ill let you go with a warning. So the cop pulls away and the guys are just sitting there. Big Ben says now you know why they call me big ben. Henne Says your lucky im stacked. Sanchez says your lucky i had a boner!

 

[baseballcb95]

So a Bills fan walks into a local Buffalo bar to see the big game, he nd his cat walk in and right away the owner stops them "hey come on, this is a bar, we dont want no cats in here" the man replies "no u dont understand, he's a die hard Bills fan and we wont bother anyone i promise" the owner thinks about it and says "alright, sit down at the end of the bar, dont make a fuss or im going to have to ask u to leave..."

They'r sitting there, surrounded by Bills fans when all of the sudden their kicker hits a 45 yd field goal, everyone is cheering and high fiving.. the owner looks down to the end of the bar and much to his surprise, the fans cat is running down the bar with his Bills helmet on, he's a big hit with everyone and the owner gets to talking to the guy..
"Ey thts pretty coool, i like him"
"thanks sir, arent u glad u let us in?"
"Yea, im just wondering what happens when they get a touchdown?"
"idk, ive only had him for 3 years"

:lol2::lol2: