Mora Sr. would be awesome. You guys forget that he made the Saints respectable (they were always the WORST team in the NFL before he got there). You forget that he made the Colts respectable.
Plus the press conferences would be a thing to die for. Here are some samples:
(in New Orleans, after a rough loss)
"We couldn't do diddly-poo offensively. We couldn't make a first down. We couldn't run the ball, we didn't try to run the ball. We couldn't complete a pass. We sucked. The second half we sucked. We couldn't stop the run. Every time they got the ball, they went down and got points. We got our asses totally kicked in the second half. It was a horsesh** performance in the second half, horsesh**. I'm totally embarrassed and totally ashamed. The coaching [mumbles] .. The coaching did a horrible job, the players did a horrible job. We got our asses kicked in the second half. It sucked."
(describing a game in which the Colts turned the ball over repeatedly, including a Manning interception run back for a touchdown)
"I don't care who you play, whether it's a high-school team, a junior college team, a college team, much less an NFL team, when you turn the ball over five times, four interceptions, one for a touchdown, you ain't gonna beat anybody I just talked about.
That's pitiful. I mean, it's absolutely pitiful, to, to perform like that. PITIFUL!
One for a touchdown, three others in field position to set up touchdowns, you ain't gonna beat anybody I just talked about, anybody! Alright? And that was a disgraceful performance, in my opinion. We threw that game. We gave it away, by doing that. We gave 'em the friggin game! In my opinion that SUCKED. I mean, you can't turn the ball over five times like that. Holy crap! I don't know who the hell we think we are when we do something like that. Unbelievable.
FIVE TURNOVERS!
One of 'em... we've thrown four interceptions for touchdowns this year, that might be an NFL record. Hell, we still got six... five? Five! FIVE! We've still got six games to play, no telling what might happen! I mean, it's pitiful. It's absolutely pitiful to perform like that. If our defense hadn't played halfway decent against a great offensive football team, they might have scored SIXTY!
That's it!"
(fielding questions about the loss)
"All I know is we threw four interceptions." (pounding his hand on the podium as he begins reciting the litany of turnovers) "And fumbled once. One interception they returned for a touchdown, three others were in our end of the field where they scored points. That's all I know."
"Uh, playoffs!? Don't talk about playoffs! You kidding me? PLAYOFFS!?!? I just hope we can win a game... another game!"
"Am I emotional? You're damn right I'm emotional. I apologize."