AUSTIN, Texas — So you're the rest of the America. You're not a chowderhead, you don't live anywhere near Beantown and you don't worship the very ground that Tom Brady hobbles around on. You hate all things New England Patriots, from the quarterback's walking boot to the coach's grubby hoodie.
Well, we're here as part of the Anti-Patriot Defamation League, ready to trumpet all that is good about the NFL's reigning dynasty, and there is much to love.
Now you may say they are a team that only a mother could love - yeah, Lizzie Borden's mom.
But you are wrong. Forget what you're hearing from those cranky, old Miami Dolphins crybabies. Who cares if Bill Belichick had too much fun a while back with his birthday-gift camcorder? There is plenty of warm, cuddly stuff about this New England team, and we're not talking Brady's little black book.
So with apologies to the New York Giants, here's why you should root for the good-guy Patriots in Sunday's Super Bowl, and every bit of this infomercial is 100 percent true:
— Tight end Kyle Brady once donated $6,300 to help buy an ambulance for a children's hospital.
— Two years ago, former Baylor Bear Willie Andrews was the first Patriots rookie to lead the club in special teams tackles since Tebucky Jones. And everyone loved Tebucky.
— Matt Cassel, the guy who could get on the field Sunday if Brady can't (yeah, right), has thrown only 39 passes in his three-year NFL career and just seven this season. But he did play on a World Series Little League finalist from Northridge, Calif., and was even drafted by the Oakland A's.
— Bill Belichick needs a hug. A wardrobe makeover. And a conscience, but hey, we're being positive here.
— Cornerback Ellis Hobbs III wants to be an animator for Walt Disney films. You want to root against a guy who wants to draw for "Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs"?
