Ross Never Planned on Hiring Caserio

[Pelorus Jack]

It has now been confirmed by unidentified sources that Mr. Ross is actually a very clever super-spy genius type that brought Caserio down with the fake offer to interview for the Dolphin GM job just to obtain inside information of the Patriots.
As a result of multiple fake interviews Mr. Ross (aka super genius) was able to obtain very classified top secret information about the entire Pats organization. Information that will now be used to allow the Dolphins to heartily defeat the Patriots this coming season and beyond.

Some of the top secret information uncovered is..
Bill Belechik is in fact Yoda's illegitiment love child.
Tom Brady wears women's thong underwear under his uniform during games (this was not really secret though).
Bob Kraft has had plastic surgery on his face to make him look more like his idol Tony Bennet.

There is of course much more 'secret' information that is far too damaging to the Patriots organization, and the entire NFL, that may or may not be revealed so..

Don't be mislead my fellow Dolphin fans the team is not really owned by a big Doofus that has no idea what he is doing and is not destined to a future of mediocrity and embarrassment for the foreseeable future.


Stephen M. Ross (Spymaster)

The laughs on you Mr Kraft... myahahahaha

 

[Stefins]

If I want bad attempts at comedy, I will watch a Will Ferrel movie

 

[HoneyB]

He has to understand by now that everything he's doing in this GM search is in the public eye. So from that perspective, why would he offer Caserio the job if everyone in the twitter and blog universe in Boston and Miami is admitting that Nick is just trying to get a pay raise in Boston? Maybe Caserio would have considered it if it was an offer "he couldn't refuse," perhaps, but Ross is not prepared to do that. Not that he doesn't have the fortitude, but just because he's already committed to Philbin, to the OC, to the assistant coaches, to the QB, to the scheme, and the power structure.

I'm surprised at Ross. But then again, there's been no official word from the Dolphins on this, they've never admitted they actually offered him the position. What they're admitting to is that he was a finalist, just like Farmer was a finalist, and now he's backing out. Maybe they offered the job, maybe they just had a conversation about what it would take to keep him here. Then Caserio is announcing with trumpets that he has a job offer on the table so he can have leverage with the Patriots.

 

[buzdoubt]

If I want bad attempts at comedy, I will watch a Will Ferrel movie

hey! will's not that bad...

 

[dlockz]

Well according to Ross he never made an attempt to make jim Harbaugh is coach and just went to give him career advice, advising him to stay at Stanford. So I expect the same integrity when they announce their next fabrication

 

[Pelorus Jack]

If I want bad attempts at comedy, I will watch a Will Ferrel movie

Or you could just look at your baby pictures... :d-day:

 

[DaLionsden189]

Yea I read this same article in the national enquire too haha

 

[OnDaChainWax]

If I want bad attempts at comedy, I will watch a Will Ferrel movie

The Miami Dolphins saga isnt enough?

 

[DuderinoN703]

If I want bad attempts at comedy, I will watch a Will Ferrel movie

Good to know your sense of humor stinks

 

[Stefins]

Or you could just look at your baby pictures... :d-day:

Wow.. Strike 2.... Another BAD attempt at humor..

 

[Pelorus Jack]

Actually I was just trying to be pleasant and share a smile with a fellow Fin fan, strike 3 if you like but the truth is I could give 2 ****s what you think..